Regional Weddings

India is the motherland of people belonging to varied religions, castes and communities. In fact, they even speak different languages and belong to different cultures. It is thus, regarded as one of the live examples of unity in diversity. This diversity is even visible in the customs and traditions of the people. To cite an example, Indian weddings are celebrated with the same fervor everywhere, though their way of conduct is different. Regional marriage ceremonies vary in accordance with factors like religion, region and faith.

However, they do have the same expression and significance. It's after all the union of the two souls, which is blessed by the Lord as well as the elders of the family and society. Moreover, the ancient wedding rituals are still practiced today and the institution of marriage is considered one of the most sanctimonious bonds between two people on earth. To know about the regional Indian wedding ceremonies in detail, read on.

 Assamese Wedding     
An Assamese marriage is the wedding ceremony which takes place in the state of Assam or between Assamese people. In Assamese language, the ceremony is known as Biya. Just like a Hindu wedding, an Assamese wedding also has pre wedding and post wedding rituals.

 Bengali Wedding                        b
bengali marriage ceremony takes place in the state of Bengal or between Bengali people. The wedding ceremonies in Bengal are quite long and elaborate. There are a number of rituals and ceremonies that take place during the wedding.


Buddhist Wedding                               
Buddhist marriage is very simple and does not involve any complex ritual. The most pleasant thing about the Buddhist weddings is that they are based more on faith and less on religion. A typical wedding takes place in two parts, one is Buddhist component and the other is non-Buddhist component.

Christian Wedding                                    
In Christianity, marriages are considered the union between man and woman predestined by God. The sanctity of the institution can be made clear from Jesus' message, which lays down that wedding is a relationship, a union so real and intimate that 'the two become one flesh'.

Gujarati Wedding                
Gujaratis or the people of Gujarat are known for their rich, vibrant and colorful culture. Moreover, they are warm and cheerful, who are fond of celebrating festivals with fervor. This is quite evident in a Gujarati marriage as well. The wedding rituals in Gujarat are simple and filled with fun.

Hindu Wedding                             
Hindu marriages are the most lavish and extensive. They extend over a period of four to five days. They are highly traditional and strongly adhere to the ancient customs and traditions. Moreover, wedding is considered an important religious practice in Hindu religion. It is held as one of sacred sixteen sanskaras or sacraments. 

Jain Wedding
Like all other religions, Jains also celebrate their marriages with great enthusiasm. They also have a number of rituals before and after marriage, which are performed with utmost simplicity and sanctity. Though in Jain religion, marriage is considered a worldly affair, it is still highly advocated. In Jain wedding ceremony, a grand 

Jewish wedding                             
Jewish weddings are conducted in a very traditional manner. It is much more than just exchanging rings as it reminds them that they are responsible for each other as well as the religion and culture. The wedding ceremony is known as 'kiddushin' 

Kannada Wedding                                                  
Kannada marriages are the weddings conducted in the state of Karnataka. In performance, Kannada marriage resembles the traditional Hindu marriage. However, the customs and traditions observed do differ according to the region they are practiced in.

Kashmiri Wedding                                      
kashmiri marriage, as the name suggests is the wedding ceremony celebrated in the valley of Kashmir. Just like the beautiful environs and the innocent natives of the place, Kashmiri wedding ceremonies are also quite simple and conducted in accordance with their own customs and rituals.

Maharashtrian Wedding                                                      
Maharashtrian marriage is perhaps the simplest and the least opulent in the whole country. Unlike other weddings, most of the rituals are preformed early in the morning. The Maharashtrian marriage procedure starts with finding a suitable counterpart.

Marwari Wedding                                                                          
Marwari marriage is celebrated with gaiety. It is an elaborate affair and extends over a period of days. Marwari wedding strictly adhere to the ancient customs and traditions. There are a number of pre wedding, wedding and post wedding rituals, which are observed. 

Muslim Wedding                                                      
Muslim marriage is known as 'Nikah' in Urdu. It is given great importance in the religion of Islam and is even mandatory for all. Though the wedding rituals of Muslim marriage vary greatly from the Hindu religion, it significantly lays emphasis on the union of two souls.

Oriya Wedding                                        
Oriya marriage is associated with the state of Orissa. The wedding ceremony and rituals bears resemblance with the Hindu marriage ceremony but are certainly different in many aspects. Oriya people are not very showy and believe in simple living.

Parsi Wedding                                                          
Parsi marriage is known as 'Lagan' and is conducted with great zeal and fervor. The customs and traditions observed in the Parsi marriage are quite different from the traditional Hindu marriage. This makes them a lot more fun and interesting.

Punjabi Wedding                                  
Punjabi marriages are known for their pomp and show. Just like the opulent culture of Punjab, Punjabi weddings are quite fun. They are conducted lavishly and celebrated with extreme gaiety. It is difficult to resist the fervor of these weddings as they comprise of traditional folk dances such as Bhangras and Giddas.

Sikh Wedding                                                                    
Sikh marriages are also quite elaborate and extend over a time period of one week. However, they are not as pompous and showy as Hindu weddings. Sikh marriage is very simple and adheres to the religious practices. 

Sindhi Wedding                                                        
Sindhi people are basically Sanatani Hindus, who do not follow Hindu rites strictly. However, Sindhi marriage is conducted in accordance with the Vedic rites. Sindhi weddings reflect a blend of Hinduism and Sufism. 

Tamil Wedding                                                    
Tamil marriages are not very showy and extravagant as Tamilians believe in simple living. Tamil people are very particular about their customs and traditions. However, Tamil weddings are attended by distant relatives and friends and hence are held on a large scale. 

Telugu Wedding                                        
Telugu marriage is accomplished strictly in accordance with the age old customs and traditions. For this reason, it even bears resemblance with Hindu and Tamil weddings. One of the special features of Telugu culture is that the bride or wife is given utmost importance in the society.

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The need and Scope

Although it is said that marriages are made in heaven and it is considered as one of the sweetest moments of our life, which may end up in contrary and not all the couples are lucky enough to have a perpetual marital bliss due to improper selection of life partner. Every couple may have some dispute at some point in time, but some couples face serious problems regarding their marriages which leads to divorce and these problems may also give rise to frustration, depression, conduct disorder and even suicidal motive among them.
Marriage is not a fun factor. It is perhaps the most complex and multidimensional human relationship and marital choice is perhaps, the most crucial decision of a lifetime. Its effects are lasting and highly significant, not only for the well being and happiness of the couple, but also for the welfare of their children, family and for society as a whole. But unfortunately, couples may not be equipped to deal with the challenges, they face in marriage. Today life is very hectic. People experience tremendous pressure in all fronts. Families are mostly nuclear in size and attitude. There is no bond created by tradition, heritage or religion, leaving most young people in an atmosphere in which they do not know what to expect from their partners during their marriage. Married couples face problems which may have developed for many reasons. Faith or mutual trust is the foundation of any marital relationship and when that faith is shaken, the foundation becomes unstable. Also phenomenal change has taken place in the status of women. Strangely enough men and women accept each other as equals at workplace, but the scenario at home is entirely different. Women are rebelling against such automatic role allocation and are less willing to accept injustice, oppression or second class treatment within a family. Thus a need is felt for proper guidance to both partners to make them understand role-sharing in married life. Marital discord arising from such role issue or any other issue is the constant for many couples and if not addressed earlier then, it may end up in divorce. The percentage of arranged marriages in India is still high and in such cases couples don’t have the opportunity to know each other at the pre-marital stage. It may cause many problems in post-marital stage.
All over the world, divorce rates are in rise. In India the percentage of divorce has increased from about 5% in 1974 to about 30%. At present the rate is increasing steadily. Invariably the cause is found to be either physical incompatibility or emotional incongruity between partners. Research has found that happily married couples have lower rates of illness, depression and conflict in and outside their marriage. Well adjusted partners make easier transitions to parenting and tend to be more supportive parents. For most people, marital satisfaction is the best index of family satisfaction; which is the best predictor of well being.
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The Way of Counselling

Pre-marriage counselling is a psychological and allied counselling, given to prospective wives and husbands before marriage. It plays an important role in building healthy marriage, enabling the couple to understand better each other’s family culture, socio-economic status, personality traits, thoughts and emotions, sexual orientation & preferences etc. to overcome challenges and difficulties, that might occur in marital relationship. Pre-marriage counselling also assists one in selecting the right life partner for him/her and in determining if he/she is fully ready physically and mentally for marriage. It clears up misconception about sex, talks about issues like interpersonal relationship, intimacy and family planning.People are fast becoming aware of sexually transmitted diseases and they want to be sure about the physical well being of both partners before they get married. During counselling blood group matching and other tests may also conducted with the consent of the counsellee to diagnose physical incompatibility. Parents may at times be unaware of certain conflicts and concern regarding their child. This is where pre-marital counselling helps to bridge the gap.
Marriage counselling (Pre/Post) generally cover topics and issues such as :
1. Marriage Expectations
2. Identifying strength & growth areas
3. Personality traits and issues
4. Communication
5. Conflict resolution skills
6. Values and beliefs, setting up family goals
7. Family origin issues,
8. Socio-Economic status and background
9. Role relationship and interpersonal relationship
10. Financial management 
11. Leisure activity planning 
12. Sexual expectations, sexual orientations, couple closeness / intimacy and flexibility 
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16. Children & Parenting issues, etc
The Marriage Counseling Personality Assessment looks at :
1. Assertiveness: the ability to express feelings to one’s partner and to be able to ask for what one would like.
2. Self-Confidence: focuses on how individuals feel about themselves and their ability to control things in their lives.
3. Avoidance: the tendency to minimize issues and the reluctance to deal with issues directly.
4. Partner Dominance: considers how much a person tries to control and dominate his/her partner’s life.

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We believe all men and women are born equal and everyone deserves a chance to find happiness. Circumstances at time make some of us more vulnerable than others, but given an equal chance their dreams too can be realized. We take special care in bringing together hearts which have been hurt by either circumstances or challenges. It does not matter who you are or what are your challenges, we firmly believe everyone is born equal and has the right to find true happiness in life by sharing their lives with their twin souls.
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PRE-WEDDING RITUALS

Ashirbaad - On an auspicious day the elders of the groom's side go to bless the bride and vice versa, by sprinkling husked rice and trefoil on their heads and giving them gold ornaments. It is a kind of acceptance of the boy and the girl on both sides.

Aai Budo Bhaat - A bachelorette party for the bride before the D-day thrown by relatives or friends. It signifies their approval as well, and also encourages community feeling.

Holud Kota - A ceremony in which five or seven married women of the household grind turmeric with mortar and pestle and anoint the bride with turmeric paste. This brightens up the bride's complexion and makes her skin glow.

Dodhi Mongol - At dawn on the day of marriage seven married ladies adorn the bride's hands with the traditional bangles Shakha and Paula - one pair of red and one pair of white bangles, and feed her a meal of curd and rice, the only meal for the day.

MAIN WEDDING RITUALS

Bor Jatri - The members of the groom's house as well as his friends dress in their best attire and journey to the bride's house where the wedding takes place.

Bor Boron - When the bor jatri reaches the bride's place, usually the mother of the bride along with other members come out to welcome the groom and his family by showing the holy earthen lamp, sprinkling trefoil, and husked rice placed on a bamboo winnow (kula). Then they are served sweets and drinks.

Potto Bastra - After the groom is seated at the chadnatolla (wedding altar and canopy) - the sanctum sanctorum where only the groom, bride and the priest takes their place, the groom is offered new clothes by the person who is to do the sampradaan - a kind of gift to the boy from the girl's side.

Saat Paak - The bride, usually seated on a low wooden stool called pidi is lifted by her brothers and is taken round the groom in seven complete circles. The significance is they are winded up securely to each other.

Mala Badal - After the circles are completed, still sitting high on the piri, the bride and the groom exchange garlands of fragrant flowers thrice. This is the first step in which they accept each other.

Subho Dristi - After garlanding one another the bride and the groom are made to look at each other in front of all the assembled invitees. This exchange of loving glance is to initiate them to be together officially by the society.

Sampradan - The bride then takes her place at the chadnatolla where an elderly male member of the bride's family hands her over to the groom and the couple's hands are bound by the sacred thread amidst recital of Vedic chants and are placed on the mangal ghot - a brass pitcher filled with water that is covered with mango leaves attached to one twig and a green coconut placed on it.

Yagna - The bride and groom sit in front of the sacred fire and chant mantras after the priest. Agni, the fire god is made the divine witness to the marriage.

Saat Paak - Seven circular rounds are taken by the couple around the fire thereby solemnizing the occasion.

Anjali - An offering to the fire is made. The bride's brother puts puffed rice (khoi) in the hands of the bride, and the groom standing close to her holds her hands from the back and extends their arms forward. They then pour the offering into the fire together.

Sindoor Daan and Ghomta - Once again seated at their respective places in chadnatolla the groom applies sindoor or vermilion (a symbol of marriage worn by Hindu women thereafter) on the bride's hair-parting. The bride then covers her head with a new sari offered by the groom as ghomta or veil.

POST-WEDDING RITUALS

Bidaay - This is a farewell - mixed moment of joy and sorrow as the bride is bid adieu with blessings of her parents and relatives to start a new life with her beau.

Kaal Ratri - After the couple reaches the groom's house and the initial welcome ceremony is over they are separated for the night, probably to get a refreshing sleep and prepare for the next day's final wedding ceremony.

Bou Bhaat & Bodhu Boron - The girl cooks and serves all the members of her husband's family. A banquet is held to treat the guests who lavish gifts on the new bride.

Phool Shojja - The couple is adorned with flowers and are left together alone in their room to enjoy conjugal bliss on a bed laid with flowers.

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